Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Worldly Woes!


I wanted to tell you that how my life is full of random moments. Why? because it's a better thing to start than saying "yes! I am back again" Yet again

Well, it doesn't take the wits of a rocket scientist to figure out that this blog has been dysfunctional for quite some time now - very much close to FIVE months.


And I have no idea why did I stop scribbling on this blog and when? It just happened. Like falling out of love. Somewhere it felt like a chore and I grudgingly dragged my feet along. all so much so that I did keep up the charade of constantly reminding myself that such a space existed and my regular readers (yes! you can laugh to that) would be missing me. With time, washed away many disillusions, for no one actually missed my constant banter.  That is what pushed this space into an existential crisis and I had no time to figure out answer to any of the questions it asked.

 Now that I have explained well about my absence, does this count? no? well back to ironies then. Right up there when I was all set to badger the blog world about the details of my life, read : many months ago, I land up right in the middle of a job. Sigh! Only when I try to make myself a little less elusive, this happens. Not cool at all, I tell you. 

If you are still wondering about the moments of life that I started with, well answer to that is simple. I needed something to start with. If you are a blogger, you'd understand. Getting back to what I am up to, living life in a tinsel town has become a de-facto. All these years I whined how I hated the town, then I fawned over how I'd miss the people and not the place and then I actually had tears when leaving the place. While everybody was busy deciding holiday plans and what- next, I actually had my hands on my joining date. 
Getting to that, when you do what I do for a living, life gets some varied flavors altogether. Read on.
 Airports become your favorite hangouts (yes, this is where I catch up with my friends) and the ground staff are the new buddies on Facebook friend's list. The phrase 'commute to work' takes a different height all together and involves boarding passes, X-ray machines and counter check-ins. You start referring to your current hotel as your "home" and know that the receptionist has a 2 year old kid. You have a favorite 'seat' in planes and you manage to make mid-flight-mid-sleep-eyes-closed toilet trip and a de-tour. Fight delays become your me-time. And you sleep like a baby during flight turbulence.

Now its amazing how something as stupid as flight turbulence can bring out life's perspective to you. There I was, with the airplane completely out of its mind (or it did seem so) and I had those rare moments with my whole life flashing in front of me. And no it was not just the past but what I had thought about the rest of it. And then all of a sudden I realized if at all my time had come, I would be leaving with a baggage of regrets. I thought of all the plans; grand and otherwise. The trip to Istanbul, the book I had started to write, my list of '1000 things to do before I die', all the weight I wanted to lose, the tattoo I wanted to get- everything. Everything that had been put off to a loop of  'next year', when I would have 'enough money' and the time would just 'be right'. Just then, so many thousands of feet above the ground level, with the aircraft swinging as if suspended like a feather in the air and a sad sinking feeling in my guts, I realized that there would never be enough money and never would the time be just right. About time. And that was my more than a 'Eureka!' moment. 

Eventually, the turbulence stopped and I went back to sleep. Okay I love napping in there. But something did change in that moment of ho-hum. And just like that, when I landed I had a special spring to my steps, a huge grin on my face and a purpose in my eyes that my time here is finite. 

And you talk about Life changing. Who needs "Monk who sold his Ferrari" when you've got turbulence, Right?




9 comments:

  1. When you have got turbulence, you need nothing. Simple. Nothing, that is. So, when is that next year coming? When are you writing your book? When are you planning to go to Istanbul? I hope you manage to earn "enough money", and find the "right time."

    And yeah, you were right... when you mentioned your loyal readers missed you - no one really misses anyone. They are just going to fucking fake around that they actually did miss you, so that you manage to bump on their blog, and comment. Don't do that.

    Be. Regular. Now. If you can manage that. And yeah, keep ranting. Whatever shit. I sincerely hope, next time something as "vague", and yet as "important" as "flight turbulence" brings out something important out of your life, again. Till then! :)

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  2. Virgin!!!! > After the turbulence, I'm not waitig for the next year anymore. The book is in process, the tattoo is scheduled next month. The trip to Istanbul is on a hold, instead there's a quickie to Greece!! ( :D )
    Every time i promise i'll be regular, I fail!!! Guide me to be as regular and self obsessed as you are!! I'll do some good to the world that way!!

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  3. A quickie to Greece? Oh, dear holy God - (That's me!) - that makes me jealous. Okay, not jealous. Fucking jealous, eh?

    The tattoo? Ouch, what and where?

    The simplest way to be regular is to find out way to rant about things which don't even bother you, for the sake of it. Initially, it's somewhat irritating, but works out well, that way. Tried. And. Tested. I swear. #truestory

    And self obsessed? Well, to sum it up, I am my own personal God. (Oh my, am I really stretching it, too much, now? Like, really? Eh?) :)

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  4. yes Greece it is!! Do a favour and capture your green face with envy picture!! To stretch it more, Greece on work!! Tralala!!
    at times, i indeed get bothered by my rants, and that makes me think about the reader and then it ends up piling in the drafts section!! Trust me on that, i have more that 140 drafts! :p

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  5. Okay, stop kidding me, now. Who the hell on Earth goes to GREECE for WORK? I MEAN. DEFINE WORK for me, please? Even if going by the Physics definition of work, your displacement is so much, that you are certainly doing some work. Sheh!

    -

    140? Gulp. And I thought, I was the mad one. Phew, I am not the lone loser, then. Screw you. :p

    Don't worry about your readers. They will read, anyway, if you just visit their blog and leave an "OMG, it's awesome!" comment. No. You know that, too, right? And be active on Indiblogger, post this to Indivine, and the lot, you know. And when you have got absolutely nothing to do in your life, visit other blogs. Yeah. Weird. But, that works, too. Tried. And. Tested. Yet, again. :p

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  6. hahhaha!!! I get that question a lot!! A lot! "Who the hell goes to {this place} for work?"
    Answer: a Fashion journalist who's boss' pet peeve goes to these places for work!!

    and yes! 140 it is!! talk of blogging loser and not mention me!! that's be downright insane!

    hahaha!! i am indeed trying out your tried and tested methods to be regular!!

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  7. Suddenly, I realized that I have A GREEK, er, GREAT FASHION SENSE, and I am a LEGENDARY BRILLIANT WRITER - good enough to visit Greece for such an assignment. #truestory :p

    Also. Why don't you post your journalism stories, or traveling stories,(Don't post them. Still jealous!) or any lame, fake, insane, for the sake of a story, story? Guaranteed readers. Check the "alienated" on my blog, and you'll know it all.

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  8. A Greek fashion sense can you get an assignment in Greece for sure!! But they are prudes, won't quite like humans who have been captured by aliens and returned back!

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  9. And here I was happy about being kidnapped. Such are life's fucking plays. Kill me.

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Why I write this ?

so you finally want to know. Well very often I have a writer's block. I am over burdened by my own thoughts. Sometimes i do take the pain of puttin them up, mostly i do not. This is a peek-a-Boo of what i see, what i feel and what i want you to know. Bear with me! Happy reading!